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(by grandma hands)


I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via enemy0fthew0rld)

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I’ll be drunk again. unter We Heart It.
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i am so threatened by pretty girls they are terrifying 

(Source: friendzonked, via setmariahfree)

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Rachel Baran, Dependency, 2014 

I just want to lay in bed with someone in our underwear and make out, watch movies and fuck like 3 or 10 times

(Source: tits-n-t4ts, via s3ppo)